Okay, so this wasn’t all that novel. I knew that I wanted to write a book. That’s the whole idea behind This Is Our Life.
I began my book club with the following exchange of emails:
Kristin: So, like, what do you want to write about?
Me: I want to write about hope.
Kristin: Is there anything that I know that you might not want to write about?
Me: Oh, there are a lot. For example, the thing that I worry about most is racism. That’s the thing that bothers me most about my white friends, and even my black ones. I can’t be too friendly with the latter. The thing is, if you’re upset because of racism, you’re usually okay with rote compliance and mindless compliance. You can try and be sincere, and try to see what the sensitivity to the suggestion is. But usually, it’s a dead end.
So what I’ve wanted to write about is genuine concern for my friends who are excluded, underserved, or discriminate. I’ve wanted to write this book for many years, but I have no idea how to do it will be.
And that’s okay. Most of us know how to do most of the things we tend to care about most (i.e., health, work, social responsibility, etc.) and then some, but we rarely put them to use.
So how do you get started?
Write down three things you have learned from your friends and/or family.
Ask someone how they are implementing silences or in-jokes to their day.
Chances are, you’ll spend most of your time with people who are silent or cover by themselves. Choose a reliable source and contact them. These are going to be different people with completely different life circumstances.
Then, based on what you’re seeing, write down another three things you have learned from your friends and/or family.
Ask someone else how they are implementing positives when they’re stressed.
What is it that you are already doing to help other people? Try to remember that it is not your day alone. What will you remember about your friends and family? How about sharing something simple with them? A favorite song might be a great song to listen to as you walk.
Stingleys, that’s what! These are for real. We will always have others’ memories of our childhood.